Cycles, Patterns and Troughs

It’s Tuesday, and that means it’s back in the trough. “Trench” might be a better word to describe it: lower than usual, dark, with the sky and life above but seemingly out of reach at the moment.

trench

I’m a bit better this week than last. My medical oncologist ordered hydration every Monday, Wednesday and Friday, which means I go into the chemo infusion center to have a saline IV for an hour. Dehydration seems to have been behind some of the weakness and shakiness, so much as the hydrations can be a pain (both figuratively and literally, since they have to find a vein 4 times a week now), they’re worth it.

For chemo, I’m in my next to last week: I have one Thursday, then one the following Monday and that’s it for the lower dose weekly Carboplatin+Taxol. My radiation goes until 12/29, so I’m closing in on the end of that as well. I’ll still have the consolidation chemo (to snag any metastasis too small for a PET scan) but I’m not going to worry about that until the time comes. Instead, I’m going to focus on getting past this week’s chemo and to the point where I only have one left.

This too shall pass.

zen

Related Posts

Be Your Own Advocate

I routinely encounter folks dealing with serious illness (mostly cancer, in my circumstances) who accept whatever the first doctor they meet tells them, even if what they’re told is that there is no hope. I

Read More »

Head and Neck Cancer Awareness Month

April is head and neck cancer awareness month! Be aware of the causes and symptoms, summarized in the graphic at the bottom. For me, it was a swollen lymph node below my jaw that didn’t

Read More »

Clinical Trial Math

Clinical trial math example: Monday + every two months = time to start worrying about my scan the following Monday. Tuesday + pain below my right ribs = worry about that AND the scan the

Read More »

My Best Days Are Ahead Of Me

Last year, I was in the hospital from chemo for my birthday, not knowing the cancer would blossom again months later. This year, I’m walking around San Francisco–short of breath sometimes, but walking–looking forward to

Read More »

Unpredictability and Patterns

The every-other-week treatment schedule has become habit at this point. In at 7:45 am, IV and blood draw, discussion with the trial nurse, meet with Dr. Ani, get the blood test results, then infusion and

Read More »

Speaking Out and its Price

I’m exhausted and stressed and sad and angry. I try to keep my posts here focused and positive, but it’s really hard at this point. I was contacted last week by the Organizing Director of

Read More »