Slow Mind, Slow Updates

I haven’t been updating the site much in the past few days, partly because it’s been quiet but mostly because the days have passed with me in a strange haze.

I’ve had a fairly persistent pain in my side that rises and lowers in severity. It’s been hurting a bit worse lately, so I’ve been taking either Tylenol with Codeine #3 or Hydrocodone every 6 hours. I’m also using cannabis oil, which involves gradually increasing the dosage to build up my tolerance. The two have combined to put me in a persistent state of almost-asleep. It makes it hard to focus on much of anything, and I really dislike the feeling.

Hopefully I’ll adjust to the cannabis oil soon so I can feel normal again. I’m going to reduce the amounts for a while too. As soon as it wears off, I feel normal again so I think the cannabis oil is the real culprit of my mental haze.

cloud mind

Googling “cloud mind” presents you with some interesting image choices.

I’m also in a holding pattern this week, waiting to hear the start date for radiation and chemo. I have an appointment with the medical oncologist tomorrow so I expect to hear more about the treatment scheduling and type at that point. I’m eager to get this show on the road!

 

Related Posts

Be Your Own Advocate

I routinely encounter folks dealing with serious illness (mostly cancer, in my circumstances) who accept whatever the first doctor they meet tells them, even if what they’re told is that there is no hope. I

Read More »

Head and Neck Cancer Awareness Month

April is head and neck cancer awareness month! Be aware of the causes and symptoms, summarized in the graphic at the bottom. For me, it was a swollen lymph node below my jaw that didn’t

Read More »

Clinical Trial Math

Clinical trial math example: Monday + every two months = time to start worrying about my scan the following Monday. Tuesday + pain below my right ribs = worry about that AND the scan the

Read More »

My Best Days Are Ahead Of Me

Last year, I was in the hospital from chemo for my birthday, not knowing the cancer would blossom again months later. This year, I’m walking around San Francisco–short of breath sometimes, but walking–looking forward to

Read More »

Unpredictability and Patterns

The every-other-week treatment schedule has become habit at this point. In at 7:45 am, IV and blood draw, discussion with the trial nurse, meet with Dr. Ani, get the blood test results, then infusion and

Read More »

Speaking Out and its Price

I’m exhausted and stressed and sad and angry. I try to keep my posts here focused and positive, but it’s really hard at this point. I was contacted last week by the Organizing Director of

Read More »